Alien Agent

Our friend from I Am Omega, Mark Dacascos, has made his way back to Medusa's Face with this movie.  And with him comes Billy Zane, from The Mad.  And I know what you are thinking, ... so what.  I don't know.  It's always nice to see some familiar faces.

 

Aliens need to destroy mankind so that they can inhabit Earth.  The alien planet that they currently live on is out of water.  So some rebels have made their way here and they will stop at nothing to be able to transport more aliens to Earth so that they can take over the world and bring all of the other aliens here.  Except for one thing.  Rykker, Mark Dacascos, is one of the good aliens and he has been sent here to stop the rebels.

 

Of course the rebels can care less about any humans in their way, so they go on a killing spree when they are out taking the materials that they need to create the portal.  Rykker is always hot on their trail and has these special bullets to use when he needs to kill one of his fellow aliens.  Oh, .. and the aliens are like some sort of parasite.  They can only be killed by the special bullets.

 

Just know this, ... the storyline is not that terrible and the only thing worth watching in the whole movie is when Rykker bursts through a wall and begins fighting the troops that are out to get him.  Other than that, it is pretty much B movie boredom.  The action is average, same for the acting.  Nothing to memorable about the movie.  Even the gratuitous nudity is not anything spectacular.

 

I give this movie 1 out of 5 prime rib dinners at Kelly's Diner.

The Mad

This is a zombie movie that sort of makes fun of zombie movies.  I liked how this movie didn't take itself too seriously.

 

An old man grinds up some beef and delivers it to the local diner.  As he is driving to the diner, you can see a "quarantined" sign by the slaughterhouse.  That can't be good.  The diner accepts the delivery and changes the menu for the day to have the ground beef featured for the special.

 

A group of four arrives in the town as a stop over on their way to their vacation.  They get checked in to the hotel, then head off to get some lunch.  While the father and boyfriend order the special, they are not able to get the special.  It was sold out.  The chef was saving a burger patty for himself, but it has begun to move and is no longer on the plate.  Things go south pretty quick.  The other patrons begin getting ill and one female customer asks Monica (the father's girlfriend) for some aspirin.  Monica drops the aspirin and the female customer comes up and stabs her in the head with a fork.  Oh, and the female customer is not the only one who has transformed either.  Several other customers are zombies and the father begin fending them off with a prop pitchfork.

 

Slightly funny scene in the diner when the father gets shoved into the jukebox with the female customer who is now a zombie.  The music changes and they begin dancing a waltz.  Now back to the zombies.  The boyfriend gets his toes bitten off when he tries to kick one of the zombies in the head.  Then later he gets shot.  And finally when he freaks out after being attacked by the missing meat patty, he gets decapitated.  Good stuff.

 

The father/daughter are the only ones left in the town that escape.  They arrive at the farm that sold the tainted meat.  The rancher's son greets the pair and they are off to the barn to try and find the rancher.  The rancher, who is a zombie, bites his son on the forearm.  As he is gnawing away on his own son, some of the ground beef attacks the rancher.  The police arrive and everything gets under control.  Until the policeman gets attacked by one of the meat patties.

 

Overall, it's a fairly dumb movie.  But, it is good rainy day material.  Nothing too violent or scary.  And some light hearted scenes to keep you watching.

 

I give this movie a 4 out of 5 anabolic growth hormones.